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As a tombstone tourist wandering through a cemetery or graveyard, you may have wondered WTF is the difference between a gravestone and a tombstone. Also, what about headstones? Are they all the same thing?
Well, kind of, yeah. Today, the three terms are used interchangeably to refer to a stone that marks a grave. So, it’s not a grave mistake to confuse them. But then, why are there three different words for the same thing? Well, at some point in history, they all meant something slightly different. Let’s dig in.
Headstones
A headstone is an upright stone at the head of a grave. The stone is engraved, embossed, or etched with the deceased’s name as well as birth and death dates. It may also include words or a short phrase, like “Loving Husband and Father.” Nowadays, headstones often have a picture of the deceased etched or adhered to them. My dad’s headstone does, and it’s pretty cool.
The word headstone came into the English language around the year 1400 but meant the same thing as “cornerstone.” A cornerstone is a ceremonial stone placed at the corner of a building. Basically, it joins two exterior walls together. It also acts as a structural reference point for the rest of the stones in the building’s foundation. The cornerstone displays information about the building, such as the dates of construction and the architects’ names. They’re everywhere, you’ve probably seen (or ignored) them a thousand times.
Anyway, by the late 18th century, the word headstone came to mean a grave marker, not a building’s cornerstone.
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Image credit: Norbert Schnitzler, CC BY-SA 3.0 via Wikimedia Commons
Tombstones
Today, a tombstone means the same thing as a headstone – an upright stone at the head of a grave. In the past, however, it referred to the lid of a stone coffin. The word comes from the Greek tymbos, which means “burial mound,” and stia, which means “pebble.” When put together, tymbos stia morphed into the English word “tombstone” in the mid-1500s.
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Gravestones
Gravestones were traditionally large stone slabs covering an entire grave. They were engraved with the deceased’s name as well as birth and death dates. They included an epitaph, which is a short text written in memory of a loved one. The word “gravestone” first appeared in English between 1175 to 1225. As I mentioned before, though, we now use it synonymously with tombstone and headstone. Although they aren’t really around anymore, the closest thing to traditional gravestones are grave ledgers, examples of which you can find here.
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Footstones
To spice things up a bit, I’d like to throw in yet another type of grave marker frequently used in cemeteries. A footstone is a flat engraved stone at the foot of a grave. Like a headstone, it contains the deceased’s name, birth and death dates, and a phrase or message. Footstones may be used alone or in tandem with a headstone. Family plots with a large central monument often contain footstones to mark individual family members’ graves. Finally, footstones come in handy by ensuring the edge of someone’s resting place is not disturbed when new graves are dug.
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Which Term to Use?
Now that you know the differences between gravestones, headstones, and tombstones, try to identify each type as you travel through historic cemeteries and burial sites. But don’t worry about which one you use in everyday conversation. Language has evolved so that no matter which one you use, we all know what you mean.
If you’re interested in learning more about the symbolism and artwork on tombstones, check out the following books: Cemetery Art & Symbolism in North America by D A Goodrich and Stories in Stone: A Field Guide to Cemetery Symbolism and Iconography by Douglas Keister. These links are Amazon affiliate links, which means I earn a commission if you make a purchase, at no cost to you.
Bibliography & Further Reading
“Is There a Difference Between a Headstone, Gravestone & Tombstone?” Mossfords. Accessed September 8, 2022. https://mossfords.com/helpful-tips/is-there-a-difference-between-headstone-gravestone-tombstone/
Milano, Alecia. “What is the Difference Between Headstone, Tombstone, and Gravestone?” Milano Monuments. November 1, 2022. https://www.milanomonuments.com/blog/what-is-the-difference-between-headstone-tombstone-and-gravestone
“Why Footstone Gravemarkers are Important.” Vancouver Granite Works. February 27, 2023. https://vancouvergranite.com/why-footstone-grave-markers-important/
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